Festivus for the Rest of us!

So...occasionally, the news can be funny. I mean - funny in the sense of irony of some sort, or one of those "what? this is really in the news?" kinda moments. Remember all the wonderful Sarah Palin interviews leading up to the 2008 election? Well, Charlie, don’cha know that for Tina Fey’s phenomenal impersonations of Palin on Saturday Night Live, occasionally the writers went right to the interview transcripts for material. This was sometimes funnier than anything that could have been written.

Let’s go now to the Theo Lacy jail in Orange County, California. It seems that Malcolm Alarmo King - booked for drug charges in April and suspected of being in the country illegally – saw that salami was on the jail menu. From the Orange County Register:

And that didn’t quite fit in with the fitness buff/ gym clothes model’s lifestyle. So King…asked for kosher meals. That was not because of his religion, but because they were healthier – and the 5′8″ 180 lb King wanted double portions to maintain his physique, said his attorney, Fred Thiagarajah. Judge Derek G. Johnson signed off on the high-protein double portion kosher meals for King. That didn’t sit well with the Sheriff’s Department – which pays for the food. Kosher meals are more expensive than the regular jail fare–and reserved for those with a religious need.

King eventually pleaded guilty to the sale or transport of a controlled substance. Two other felonies were thrown out…it was sentencing time...and King still wanted his meals to be free of salami. At this point, Judge Johnson said that he needed a religion to put down on the order to allow the special meals to continue. King’s attourney said “Festivus,” and the order was granted – three non-salami meals a day.

It was argued...the case was presented...that Festivus is a completely fictitious holiday – having been given to the world through an episode of Seinfeld (and this is true. It was a holiday made up by the father of one of the writers). Despite the proof given, “the judge’s order stood. No salami.” They might've well stuck with his original - admittedly farcical - religion...which was listed as Healthism. King, at the extra expense of the Sherrif's Department, was able to get his Salami-free meals for two months before the county got the order thrown out.

King is currently awaiting deportation, and some are questioning the wisdom of those who made the decisions regarding King, and his dietary requests. Check out the comments at the OC Register for more on this. And check out this clip - from Seinfeld - on the wonderful tradition of Festivus!